More pics from Coloma vacation

Our mini vacation in coloma Ca.

My uncle Gene

My Brother

My Brother Michael died 15 years ago today. I remember that Valentines Day, It's the only Valentines Day that I do remember. It was a warm day for February.
I was wearing a red sweater, black leggings and boots. For dinner I planned shrimp scampi for my family. I got the call during dinner time. I did not finish my dinner. I wish I could have been with him before he went. Not even my mom was there in time. Valentines Days was not enjoyable for many years. I am able to enjoy them now but I will always think of Michael and relive that day in my mind each year.

My mother, I love her with all my heart.

My mother has dementia. At times she is not sure that I am her daughter, but she knows that I am very important to her. I am very sad that our family has been dealt this card. Dementia steals the memories from a person and leaves them with confusion, sadness, paranoia and sometimes odd behavior. Imagine if you will, what that might be like for that person. Nothing makes sense and everyone tells you that you are wrong or mistaken, those voices you hear are not really there, the people you talk about are not here either. Imagine feeling like everyone is against you, no one will let you do as you would like, because they can't let you act upon your impulses no matter how real and necessary they feel to you. Your freedom, your quality of life has been taken from you. The care givers of this person feel this pain as well. It truly is a pain, a pain in the heart, it really hurts. Sadness,loss and anger best describes my emotions. There is a lot to say but I do not want to go that deep right now. Through all this sadness my mother can still make me laugh, sometimes on purpose. She did and does have a great sense of humor. Her dementia makes her say funny things. For example she was telling me about this nice young man who brings her coffee in the morning ( this is really my dad) the fact that he is in his underwear is over looked. She told me of this man with a bad temper (again my dad) She says " next time I see him I'll go the other way". Anyway the purpose of this post is really and introduction to "Funny Things My Mom Say's" So stay tuned:)

I stared into this ocean watching the comings and going of fisherman, Sail boats,jumping fish, dive bombing pelicans and far off in the distance I could see Cruise ships and ferries with the help of my binoculars.

I enjoy looking down upon the world, either high upon the mountains or from a 16th floor hotel in San Francisco. There is something tranquil about watching life happen. Watching people in the city streets during their daily routines. It is at this time that I feel time stands still for me. It allows me to contemplate about my life, regroup and prioritize. Watching the ocean is another one of my favorite things. That is a whole other life all of it's own. Sunsets are awesome.They are magnificent and others are even more magnificent. It costs us nothing to see the beauty of the world. If only we could find a way to incorporate it into our day. It might be wishful thinking, but I am hoping my golden years will allow me this opportunity.